…Clueless

• I must not get attached to people. In the end they misunderstand and hurt.
• I must not turn into a sentimental fool. In the end it is I who will suffer.

Fuck the world… I give a damn. Life… stop hurting me… I’ve reached my saturation point. Spare me and find another victim… or just kill me once in for all. Can’t take this anymore.

I’ve learnt some valuable lessons in the last few days… some that have changed my entire way of thinking… made me a better person… some that have made me realise that I’m nothing more than a parasite.

• I know I was never like this and probably might never act like this again.
• I know I have no solid reason to be unhappy.

But can’t help the way I feel… can’t stop the hurt inside…

1. Mixed Feelings : My sister cleared a very important test today. She fulfilled the promise she had made to my Late Uncle and to herself. She faced many hurdles, experienced countless sleepless nights, shed a lot of tears but finally succeeded in realising her dream. But she isn’t happy. Neither am I. But why? Her best friend – Amit. Its because [...]...
2. From crappy to happy : Last Monday, the 18th was probably the saddest day of my life this year. It was my birthday and I was in no mood to celebrate. The trouble started in the morning of 17th. I had a mood swing and suddenly found myself super bored. I went out for a movie, came back and then went [...]...
3. Some things don’t change : When my Grandma passed away, me and my sister were given her room. At first we both used to be very scared of sleeping all alone in that room. We were not used to even entering that room and not looking at our grandma. But slowly, things changed. We changed. We were not scared anymore. We [...]...
4. Apology : I wish to apologise to Jaskiran, Nabeel, Divya and Kumar. I was in a crazy mood yesterday and still am. I did not reply to your messages properly. Dunno what is bugging me. Fuck… I feel like a failure. Dunno why!! Nobody has said anything to me; haven’t fought with anyone. Sitting on the computer isn’t cheering [...]...
5. Anger : I am lying on my bed at the moment. . . Thinking. . . Why, why can’t I get angry at some people. Somebody asked me this question. But the thing is, when you know, you are aware of the fact that what the other person said or did, she didn’t mean it. I get [...]...